2004-02-10 | 6:08 p.m.
bring some friends you're cool with, I'mma bring the Cool Whip

Why on MTV do they bleep out "pants off" in "Slow Jamz"? I mean, come on. It's the whole genius of the song, right there in that line (although, I will admit I love the Michael Jackson part.) Do you not know what I am talking about? Now you do. Anyway, I hate MTV. Idiots.

Speaking of that, I decided my new dream job. It is to make the fake labels for all of the products Rachael Ray uses on "30 Minute Meals." This I can't point you to a picture of or anything, and for a while I just thought she bought really weird brands of everything, but then it came to me as if in a dream -- those are faked labels, for television. Awesome. Unless that isn't true, in which case I want to work for the companies where she buys that weird food and make their labels. At this point, I want to work anywhere, thanks.

So what are YOU doing for Valentine's Day? Me, I'll be with a drag queen, as usual. Alright, maybe not as usual, but as expected. Kiki & Herb are playing and I am most excited. Speaking of excited, The Darkness are touring the States and have not one NYC date. What's exciting about that? Well, my tickets for the Boston and Providence shows, of course. All of the Darkness and none of the Hammerstein Ballroom I feared. Oh baby, it's going to be a time.

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